We were in the hospital delivery room, waiting for our second child to be born. The doctor and nurse were in the room, and I turn to my wife and say, “Hey, you know what I was thinking this morning?” in an unassuming tone. My wife obligatorily said, “What?” and I replied, “I could really use less sleep.” In my head, that line got a laugh, though, truthfully, it might have been more of an eye roll in real life. Whatever, I still think it was funny. Looks like more coffee is in my future!
I’m going to break this down as nicely as I can for any expectant parents out there. Once you have kids, sleep, as you once knew it, goes bye-bye…for a while. A normal person might reassure you about it “not being so bad” or it being “part of the treasures of parenthood.” I’m not a normal person. The no-sleep thing is pretty brutal. At first, every hour-and-a-half to three hours, the kid wakes up to eat. Then, if you’re lucky, at two to three months, you’ll get about five or six hours of peace. Oh, and in case you were wondering, every time your baby wakes up, you, as the parent, are yanked from what seems like the deepest sleep of your life, into a disoriented state of wakedness (Google docs seems to think this isn’t a word, but I don’t care. Get off my case, Google!).
Then, you have to wait until they’re somewhere between six and twelve months old for them to go a full night. The thing is, once they do, you might have a kid that goes down at 7 pm and wakes up at 5 am. And, of course, you wake up, almost fearfully, with every sniffle or cough coming out of your little one’s room, hoping and praying that they stay asleep. What’s this mean? Well, even while your child is getting great sleep, you are never able to fully doze off into the most restorative stages. That’s a big deal, ‘cause when that kid wakes up, he or she will be ready for the day in a way I’ve never seen from anyone over about 13 years old…and you, the person that is responsible for watching, caring for, and entertaining them will be tired. So, what can you do?
Sleep is pretty important to me, and I want more of it–always. Which is why I’ll take any help I can get to ensure I get it. When your baby sleeps, you can sleep. When your baby is awake, you can’t. So, in an effort to help other parents get more shut eye, I’m going to share a few tips, along with some gear that can help get your sweet little alarm clock–I mean, son or daughter–to dreamland.
When it comes to issues around the sleep of our children, my wife and I are fortunate to have our kids in Daniel Weissbluth’s pediatric practice. If you’re thinking that name sounds familiar, it’s because you’ve probably heard it before. In fact, you’ve probably heard of the Weissbluth Method. Well, as it turns out, the Weissbluth Method is a sleep strategy developed by Daniel’s dad, Marc Weissbluth. As you can imagine, the Weissbluth Method is a key part of our practice’s child-rearing philosophy, and it’s something that Daniel has worked with his dad as he’s built his own pediatric practice. What we’ve learned from our team of pediatricians at the practice is that solid sleep foundations can be built from birth, and involve five key elements for getting kids to sleep:
- Gentle Movement like slow walking, rocking, or swaying back and forth
- Soft Sounds that help replicate what they heard in the womb, like quiet singing/reading, or shushing
- A Pitch Black Room will ensure that distracting light doesn’t wake the baby
- Sucking is a soothing reflex, whether it’s the breast, bottle, finger, or pacifier
- Consistency allows babies to take comfort in routine.
Keeping these five key elements in mind, here’s some awesome gear you might want to try to help achieve the ultimate prize: getting your son or daughter to sleep.
Quick note: The products featured here were selected by me. If you click on a link and buy something, I may receive a commission. I call that a win-win.
This bad boy right here is perfect for providing gentle movement to your baby to help lull them to sleep. Added bonus: it’s multi-positional, so it adapts to ensure your comfort. Alright, alright, your comfort doesn’t really matter. But it adapts to ensure your baby’s comfort. Of course, you won’t be able to keep your baby for their full sleep session, unless you’re cool staying still for a long time. Buy it here!
I really like this contraption, and, so far, both of my kids have too! When they’re properly strapped in, while I’m walking around, it’s only a matter of time before they knock off. The support and gentle movement must keep them feeling like they’re still in the womb or something. The only issue? The dreaded transfer to a crib or bassinet. Buy it here!
If you’re worried about the transfer, then this might be your answer–a cradle that gently rocks back and forth, swaying your sweet one to sleepytown. I haven’t tried this one, here, but it’s on my short list of items to consider should we ever need to add another bassinet to the arsenal. Buy it here!
Okay, moving from gentle movement to soft sounds! I have one of these, and it’s great. For one, it delivers a good variety of sound to help baby avoid getting distracted by a squeak or tap or thud. Plus, it’s reasonably priced. That’s always nice. Buy it here!
For our first boy, this thing, right here, saved our lives. You know all that shushing you hear about? Have you ever tried to shush for more than 10 minutes straight? It’s not so easy. Well, this thing shushes for you. While they have an app, the sound isn’t quite right, and I prefer the physical unit. Highly portable (works great in the car), it provides the soothing soft sounds my kids have appreciated. But it here!
Do you appreciate something a bit more all-inclusive? Well, where the BABYBJORN cradle above is the sleep-movement combo solution, the Halo Bassinet Swivel Sleeper (which is what we have) is the sleep-sound solution. Made by the folks that coined the “back is best” tagline, this bassinet has soothing sounds, and soft music, along with vibration, a breast-feeding timer, and a night light (to keep you from fully brightening the room to check on your baby in the middle of the night). Buy it here!
Great. On to sucking! This is a pretty basic item right here. We all know about pacifiers. This model is what, according to all the hype (wait, there’s pacifier hype?) is stocked in more hospitals than any other. Well, they were in ours. They’re nice because they can be sterilized, and they are a good size for kids as young as newborn. But them here!
Mam Newborn Start Pacifiers (Boys)
MAM Newborn Start Pacifiers (Girls)
If you’re looking for an alternative to the Phillips model, this one is pretty nice. The nipple is supposed to be designed with the breastfed baby in mind. If you find your baby not into the Avent, try this one. The different nipple shape could be all they needed to calm down and enjoy something relaxing…sucking. For boys, buy them here! For girls, buy them here!
I don’t have this item or the next. But I have noticed how helpful a pitch black room can be. For our first, I would sometimes head to a closet or the bathroom, each with no windows, and pace/rock back and forth. At times, it was the only way. Currently, we rent, and I’m not into dropping gobs of money or time on installing custom window treatments that I won’t be inclined to take with me. If number two is like number one, I’ll be ordering some of this–especially for those pesky areas where the sun always seems to poke through. It’s easy application, and easy removal is perfect for someone who’s not looking for something permanent. Buy some here!
If you’ve ever been brave enough to travel with your kids, you probably have encountered a wide variety along the window treatment spectrum, from the purely decorative (the light burns!) to the total blackout. For those times when you’re on the former end of the spectrum, here’s your solution–a blind in a bag. Portable, convenient, easy, and dark! Again, I don’t have this one, but I have a trip coming up, and I’m strongly considering ordering one. But it here!
Next! Consistency. Yes, this is a Apple Watch. The great thing about them is that they are on your wrist (always nearby), they communicate exceptionally well with calendars/reminders/to-do lists, and they are designed to alert you. Just pop your baby’s routine into your productivity software, turn on alerts and notifications, and your watch will do the rest. I know it does other things, but keeping your baby on schedule can be one of those things! Buy one here!
Similar in concept to the smart watch, a personal assistance device, like the Echo Show can sync with all your productivity/scheduling stuff, and give you updates throughout the day. What I like about the Echo Show, in particular? If you set up the settings correctly, it will cycle through your items visually, giving you previews of what’s to come and updates throughout the day. It’s pretty great for making sure you hit your marks–from coffee with a friend, to afternoon feedings. But it here!
Finally, if you find yourself less intrigued by gadgets and gear, and more interested in the Weissbluth Method, I would check out the following books:
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
This one of the most important works to deal with children’s sleep habits. It’s a comprehensive overview of the Weissbluth Method that lays the foundation for building great sleep practices from birth. If you haven’t checked this one out, take a look. It’s on my shelf. Buy it here!
This book, written by Marc and Daniel Weissbluth, is designed to convey the idea that no two sleep consults are the same because no two families are the same, and encourages the reader (presumably parents!) to develop a more customized sleep routine to fit their child’s needs. I don’t have this one…yet. But it here!
This is a short book comprised of six cases that outline some common sleep issues, and their solutions, to give the reader a flavor for what a sleep consult from the man himself looks like. This is another one that I don’t have, but won’t hesitate to acquire if I mind myself in a delirium brought on by baby induced insomnia. But it here!
Parents, listen: If you haven’t been prioritizing sleep, it’s not too late to start. It’s necessary for your baby, and YOU! The restorative effects of sleep are integral to us as a species. What’s more, sleep deprivation causes all kinds of health issues, along with diminished intellectual capacity. Wanting sleep is not lazy, it’s necessary! Do yourself a favor and give some of this gear a try. Again, if your baby is asleep, you can sleep. If that happens, you’ll all be happier! Seriously, though, you’ll still be tired, so don’t be afraid to coffee up!
Worth noting again: The products featured here were selected by me. If you click on a link and buy something, I may receive a commission. I call that a win-win.
And another thing: While we belong to Weissbluth Pediatrics practice, I received no compensation for including them in this article.
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